Category: Blog

As Early Years Family Practitioner with Home Link Family Support, people often ask me ‘What do you actually do?’

I provide a home visiting service to families with at least one child under 5 years & attending a Midlothian Nursery. I work collaboratively with the nursery head teacher & staff team to organise and/or support early learning & family learning opportunities. This includes toilet training advice, sharing books together, attending Child Planning meetings and group work.

My 25hr working week is flexible and varied. No two weeks are identical but typically include home visits to the families I work with, time spent in nursery, delivery of group sessions and admin time.

The other questions people often ask me is ““How are families identified & what do you do with the families you visit?”

This is varied, specific to each family and confidential. The families I work with have, through dialogue with key members of nursery staff, identified something which is presenting a challenge and may be having an impact on their child’s nursery attendance or on an aspect of their child’s well-being, learning & development.

When I initially visit a family, I spend some time getting to know the family and what they are seeking in terms of support. My role is to tailor my visits to what the family feels would be of most benefit. Mostly I work with Mum and the children.

Often, I visit regularly, engaging the children in early learning through play activities; I provide a listening ear for Mum – someone to share worries or concerns and bounce ideas off; together we discuss the everyday challenges of raising a young family and what strategies might help to improve a particular situation. This could be in terms of the daily demands of looking after one or more children under 5 years, establishing or improving family routines, parenting skills, managing challenging behaviour or helping Mum cope with anxiety, poor mental health or feelings of isolation.

The period of time I work with a family varies, depending on individual circumstances and their wishes. I may work with a family for a relatively short period of only 3 – 4 months or I may work with a family for up to a year. In some instances, I work with a family as they prepare to leave nursery, over the summer holiday period and as the child begins and settles into Primary 1.

Home Link’s Systemic Practitioners visit families at home, to provide a form of therapy for them all together. It helps relationships and makes sure everyone’s voice is heard.

The work of a Systemic Practitioner is full of variety.  I might be out and about in the community, in family homes or doing  1:1 sessions with children in schools.  One of the things I like best about Systemic Practice is that you take time to get to know the families, and for them to get to know you, before you start to work together.  Creating a shared understanding of their past, present and hopes for the future.   Helping them to make sense of their family’s story, to see patterns that occur across generations and think about how this might be affecting them and their children now.

We think about roles that we play and who defines these roles, for example, what does it mean to be a mother, how should mothers act and according to whom.  We also think about scripts (story lines) that we might consciously or unconsciously act out, for example, we might find ourselves saying things or behaving in a way that is like someone close to us –  that moment when you realise you sound just like your mother!  By thinking about these things people become more aware of their role and their scripts, which ones are useful and which ones they might want to change.

I might find myself in a house on the floor with the family drawing out their family tree or working on a timeline from when they were born, listing all of the significant events in their lives and helping them to think about how this impacts on their current situation.  Then we think about what they might like their timeline to look like in the future.  Sometimes I do this with adults and children separately and sometimes all together.

One of the things I like most about holding a systemic perspective is that the problem never resides in one person, it is always considered within the context of the system and therefore we don’t just focus on the problem.  Being able to draw out and to focus on strengths rather than ‘the problem’ can help to motivate people to identify and to make the changes they would like.  It can also help to put problems in perspective and stop people feeling so overwhelmed. Playing games with families and engaging in activities that they enjoy, helps us all to learn more about the family dynamics and relationships and at the same time improve them.

It’s not all fun and games though, and sometimes I find myself having very difficult conversations with families.  Practising and engaging in systemic work is an emotional journey for the family and me so as part of the work I do, I have regular supervision with my peers, my manager and a systemic therapist.  This makes sure that I pay attention to the feelings I am left with as part of the process and reminds me that we’re all part of the wider system.

It is a privilege to be able to offer therapy in the heart of the community, by doing so we are reducing  the barriers to access support,  and ensuring that families in need get the opportunities at a time that is right for them, in surroundings that are most comfortable and convenient for them, which promotes  equality  and sustainable change.

We were referred a family whose son was disabled.  The mother acted as sole carer and felt she was the only one responsible for his care.  His needs were complex and she cared for him 24/7, which was exhausting for her. But she regarded it as  her duty and didn’t want to burden anyone else, even her family, with the task of looking after her son.

As the Midlothian Family Support Co-ordinator I contacted mum and arranged the first Initial Visit to discuss what a volunteer could offer and how this could help mum.  Mum was initially hesitant about accepting support, she was very anxious at the thought of allowing a “stranger” into her home to spend time with her son, as she felt this was her own duty and responsibility. Mum said her own needs were not important and that she felt very guilty if she spent time doing things for herself, such as arts and crafts, dishes, cooking, relaxation sessions etc. I explained that she was important to the family and that taking care of her health and well being was vital so that she could care for the others.  Although she was reluctant, she said she would try it, but didn’t feel this would make a difference to her.

After some consideration I introduced a volunteer who I thought would be a good match for the family.  I took the volunteer to meet them and we all discussed the support mum would like from our service. Mum said that she was happy to try weekly visits, but that she was still a little unsure.

After a month of visits, I saw the family for a usual first month review to see if the support from their Volunteer was helpful and if the family felt it was working for them. And this is what she said:

When my health visitor referred me to Home Link to see how a volunteer could come and help me with my son at home I was very skeptical about it working out.

My son has long term condition and has complicated needs with regards to handling, feeding, medication and communication. As his full time carer, I convinced myself it was my job and my job alone, but this only resulted in me feeling isolated and incredibly tired. I felt anxious about allowing anyone to help with him, even my own family.

When our volunteer started we spent the first session chatting over a cup of coffee, I felt if I got to know them better I would feel less anxious.

As the weeks went on I consciously pushed myself to create a greater physical distance between my son and myself. I started to feel a little lighter after each session, buoyed by my son clearly enjoying our volunteer’s company and the sky not caving in afterwards! I started to look forward to the next week. It was a big step to ask someone else to help with the tube feeding, which now feel I can do. Now I am planning the next step – to let someone else care for my son while I leave the house, which I haven’t done before but now feel is achievable in the near future.

Ultimately, I have come to realise that sharing my son’s care not only benefits my physical and mental health but also provides a safety net for him. In the event of the unthinkable, I know that someone else could care for him. It has been a tough journey of accepting my son’s lifelong disability and letting others in to share his care but slowly with the help of Home Link we are making changes together as a family (including the wider family circle) to safeguard our future.

I also met the family volunteer to discuss how they were feeling about how the visits were going and plan activities to do with the little boy.  I took the Volunteer to visit Midlothian Playbase, a toy library that we are a member of.  We are able to borrow books and toys for 6 weeks. The volunteer borrowed some unusually large books because they felt that A1 size books would perhaps be different for him and easily accessible. The little boy loved them and the Volunteer enjoys spending time with the boy sharing the books, and said “his wee face lights up when we read together”.

This support has had a massive impact on the family after only a few weeks and transformed mums feeling about having to take sole responsibility.

Katie has two children under 5. Due to complex circumstances, the children have had some difficulty adjusting to family relationships and engaging with other children.

Their behaviour at home is sometimes difficult to manage. An Early Years Coordinator from Home Link visited the family, and spent some time getting to know them. The coordinator discussed a support plan with the family, and the family identified what was going well and what they would like to work on. They were then matched with a supportive volunteer.

The volunteer visits for 2 hours a week. Initially she spent time getting to know the family, and playing with the children. Once they were comfortable with each other, the visits developed to include crafts, and role play, as well as free play. The children and the volunteer use lots of imaginative play, which lets them practice interacting with different people and situations.

Katie is delighted and has really noticed a change, her own mood has improved and she says:  “Daniel always looks forward to the volunteer’s visits. It has really developed his confidence. He has developmental difficulties, and the time with the volunteer has really helped. His language skills have developed and he’s learned lots of new words“.

The visits will continue for 12 months.  The coordinator will continue to review the progress with the family, and develop the support plan to meet their changing needs.

Esther Black

By Katarina Vassakou, Family Support Worker

M.: This is Elvis, and this one over here is Tom Thomas.

K.: What does Elvis want to do? Is he doing the same job as Tom Thomas?

M.: No! Elvis is going to put out the fire, he is a firefighter. Tom Thomas is a police officer, he is going to be sitting here! (Points the driving seat of the fire track).

The fire, made by yellow and orange tissue paper, is approaching one home. It is made by a big ball of crumpled paper, and moves up and down, left and right, because of the wind.

M.: Hot! Hot! (He says while Elvis is stepping on the fire). Elvis wants to go inside the house to save the people. You take Tom Thomas and put him on the ladder.

K.: Oh! A helicopter coming (scissors are used for this)! Maybe they could use the helicopter to pour as much water as they can on top of the house.

M.: Yes! And then they can go to sleep because it’s night time.

K.: The fire is almost gone, disappeared (the ball of crumpled paper is now under the table) – they made it!

M.: Elvis and Tom Thomas are going to sleep (uses both hands and pretends to sleep on the table). Now I want to go outside in the garden. I want to play ice-cream shopkeeper…

The value of pretending and of make-believe play seems less obvious. Many parents are not very comfortable when they watch their toddlers playing with their blocks or toys while talking out loud to themselves. Jean Piaget (1962) wrote that symbolic play is not just a passing feature of growth for the development of logical thought. Piaget noted that this is an intrinsic characteristic of our human nature. Pretend play serves our children well for their self-entertainment and for understanding the complexities of the world. Most importantly, it is the foundation of a long-term human characteristic: imagination. We can travel mentally through time and space, to explore a range of possible futures.

Mums and Dads, you have no reason to fear pretend play in your children! This play benefits all areas of your child’s development including their ability to express and regulate their emotions, their creativity and logical reasoning. Join in with your children’s pretend play, help them guide their storyline, and allow them to expand their knowledge of the world around them by playing “Let’s pretend to be’’.

“A family who have recently been affected by domestic abuse. Helping a family get furniture. Reading the ‘Hungry Caterpillar’. Working with Health Visitors and Social Workers . . .  .” read about a week in the life of a busy Early Years Coordinator supporting families in Edinburgh

Monday

In the morning, I come into the office, reply to emails and check my diary for the week. My first visit is with a mum with significant mental health problems with two children aged 3 and 2. We are nearing the end of our support with this family and they have recently moved into permanent accommodation. I support mum to make some phone calls about acquiring furniture. We then complete a nursery application form for her younger daughter. The rest of the visit we play with the children and after building the ‘hungry caterpillar’ jigsaw the children ask to read the story three times!

After lunch I am off out to visit a family I initially met the previous week. A mum with a 4 year old and new baby twins. She is struggling to cope with the older child’s challenging behaviour and feeling increasingly isolated. Together we make a support plan and create goals to work towards in the next three months.  She wants to be more confident managing all the children when going out, someone to talk to about her worries and to deal with the challenging behaviour more effectively. Mum says she feels better talking from talking to someone without feeling judged and we arrange another visit for the following week.

Just enough time to go back to the office, file some paperwork and update family case notes.

Tuesday

My morning today consists of meetings, starting with the monthly team meeting. In this meeting all staff members provide an update on their work from the past month and we discuss recent developments for Home Link. Then I attend Home Link’s Edinburgh team allocation meeting where all new referrals are allocated to coordinators. We then discuss families and volunteers on the waiting list and the families currently receiving support, to ensure all the families are receiving the best service suited to their needs. Afterwards we have time for a quick team lunch outside in the sunshine.

In the afternoon I head off to a family consisting of a mum and her three children aged 10, 4 and 2. This mum has struggled with poor mental and physical health and a previous abusive relationship. We play outside today and make bubbles which the kids love. We have a look over mum’s support plan and decide to start working on one of her goals, which is to start accessing more amenities in the community with her children. The family can often find themselves isolated due to mum’s mental health. We make a plan to attend a local park next week- mum and the children are looking forward to it.

Wednesday

I start my day in the office updating family case notes. I then prepare resources for the Stay and Play Group in a local community centre. We’ll be painting today so I pack a bag with various colours of paint, brushes, rollers and of course some glitter! The group is busy today with 17 children aged 0-5 from the local area attending with their parents. The children have a wonderful time creating murals with the different colours and tools, some of the children opt to paint their hands and feet making handprints and footprints! After everyone is cleaned up the children sit around the tables for a healthy snack. Following a period of free play we gather around for our Bookbug session. Today we read ‘Going on a Bear Hunt’ and finish with Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

Thursday

I begin my day with a visit to a family with a toddler and 7 month old baby. The mum has post-natal depression and no local friends or family. This family have been matched with a Home Link volunteer for 4 months now. We chat about how things have been going and review her support plan. Mum is excited to tell me about all the places she has been with her volunteer including a play group, soft play and Bookbug at the library. She met another mum at the Bookbug session who lives in her area and she is delighted that they have plans to meet for coffee. The rest of the visit I help mum to complete an Eligible 2’s Application form for her son which she hopes will get him a place at the local Early Years Centre.

In the afternoon I have a Multi-Agency Meeting for a family who have recently been affected by domestic abuse. I meet with mum, the Health Visitor, the key worker and newly allocated Social Worker. We discuss the recent events, safety issues and create a Child’s Plan establishing the roles for each professional. Afterwards, I have a coffee with mum in the local community centre. She shares that she has been very stressed over the past couple of weeks and now feels better about the increased level of support for her and the children. I agree to meet with the family the following week before returning to the office to complete paperwork.

Friday

I have an initial visit this morning to meet a newly allocated family. The family have three children under five and the middle child has recently been diagnosed with autism. The mum is feeling over whelmed with her three children and feels she is struggling with no other support and low mood. We discuss matching the family with a volunteer and the type of support a volunteer can offer. I complete all the relevant paper work with mum and arrange to get in touch in the next few weeks when I have a suitable volunteer with the family. I head straight to another home visit to carry out a play session with a mum and her 2 year old son. We spend the time singing songs, reading stories and playing with animal puppets. Both mum and the little boy really enjoy the session.

In the afternoon I return to the office to meet a volunteer for his Support and Supervision.  He has been matched with a family for 2 months and although he is enjoying it he feels that all they do is chat over a cup of tea.  I am able to feedback from the family who say the volunteer is being brilliant and the mum really looks forward to his visits and feels so much better afterwards. We look over the family’s support plan and discuss activities for the next few weeks.

Then I update all case notes from the week. I use this time to make appointments with families and return any calls I have missed during the week. I also look over my diary for the next week and update my calendar.

‘I have panic and depression, I feel I cannot take a breath’ she said.

Hira had been experiencing low mood and low self-esteem for a long time, she had several miscarriages, and a hurtful relationship with her husband. ‘I feel the walls are closing in on me’ she told me one day, ‘I want to leave him; he always makes me feel inferior’.

Hira was referred to Home Link Family Support and received staff support from Katerina, the Family Support worker of the charity organisation. Hira needed time to be more confident to take action for her decision to flee, and to trust herself again. Katerina and Hira developed a relationship of trust through time, and they made a plan together.

On that particular morning, Hira was ready and had a slight smile on her face. ‘I feel anxious, but I am ready’ she said. Hira moved successfully to safe accommodation with her three children, and this was her third attempt. According to the Domestic Violence Prevention centre, most women will, on average, attempt to leave an abusive relationship between five and seven times before successfully and permanently doing so.

Hira, six months later, is a happier and healthier person. She still lives at the safe accommodation with her children, and enjoys life again. Hira also started looking after herself – even had a new haircut! She now receives counselling and attends group therapy, and she appreciates the input of all professionals who became involved.

‘New life, new me’ as she likes to say every time we meet…